Thursday, September 20, 2012

See Ya Later Alligator

Hello my faithful family readers.Hmmmm its been a really long time since I was here last. But I just came back to say that I am done with the Blog thing.It was really fun at first. It was a cool way to share what was going on in my life and to share pictures but I just can't seem to be bothered with it anymore.Rather than having you wait with baited breath for my next post (*snicker* yeah right) I thought I would let you off the hook.

Don't be sad though I will still be hanging around on Facebook, posting pictures of my little family and gabbing about the things we are up to (when I actually have something to say) and let us not forget the lost form of communication: E-mail. *GASP* Yup I will still be there too.

So bye bye little blog- catch you on the flip side!!

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

New goal

If you will take just a moment to have a "boo" at the right hand column of my blog, you will notice that I have added a new little "ticker" called weight loss. (They have these things for everything)

One of the homeschool blogs that I follow has one on hers and I think its pretty cool and very motivating.You have something that you can physically watch and see your progress! A couple of years ago I did loose quite a bit of weight but I got lazy and gained all but 2lbs back.But I would really like to get back on track because I think it would benefit my over all health. Both physically and mentally.

Although I am aware that exercise and diet are important.I am not going to lie to you.I loathe exercise in most forms.It bores me to death.I was never very athletic as a kid and anything I did manage to enjoy back then is not even remotely possible for me to do now. Gymnastics anyone?? I don't like walking or biking unless its to go to the store for a slurpee, which totally defeats the purpose , organized sports I can't do because I don't have the stamina to keep running at a constant pace (I never could even as a kid). Jogging?? (see walking and bike riding) and who has got time to go to a gym?? not me. So I am going to go back to my trusty little Wii. The weight loss is slower but that's ok. I even have a new 'Gold's Gym' work out disc to try out. It could be fun.Skipping, boxing,cardio and other things all in the comfort of my own home. I can just let it all hang out and not have to worry that people might be staring at me.

In regards to food I find it to be quite a challenge. While I do enjoy a variety of fruits, meat and veggies I can not bring myself to eat yogurt,oatmeal,fish,beans,lentils and most anything else the nutrition world deams as "good for you".My only goal for this right now is to work on more 'from scratch' meals and less pre-packaged ones.Grocery prices have got a lot to do with this one right now.I have to carefully plan what to make in order to keep costs down.

So here's to a new adventure and hopefully a successful one!! :)

Thursday, February 2, 2012

A month of thanks

About a month ago, when I was really struggling with 'Hope', I stumbled upon this blog.In fact it was the very reason I started a thankful journal. I printed off the free calender and began keeping track of one thing for each day of the month that I was thankful for.It hasn't stopped me from having hard days, but it has helped me to put things in perspective.As the list grows longer I can go over and over it because it is in print, not just in a storage spot in my head that is easily forgotten.Maybe one day I will try the 1000 gifts.But for right now I am content to do one at a time.

I just wanted to share my list for this month.They are nothing earth shattering. Just simple every day things.
  1. Family (church,immediate,extended)
  2. Our ability to learn
  3. Beauty in photography (creativity)
  4. GOD'S provision for our needs
  5. For my husband's willingness to catch mice for me (he is the king)
  6. "Pumpkin's" servant heart
  7. My husband's patience
  8. Singing kids
  9. Inside jokes-laughter
  10. Freshly fallen snow
  11. Clean water
  12. Good neighbours
  13. The sweetness of my children when they are sleeping
  14. My favorite chair by the window
  15. Beautiful weddings
  16. 3 working vehicles
  17. A warm house
  18. Healthy, growing children
  19. Brushing "Pumpkin's" hair
  20. The smell of popcorn
  21. Saving on a weeks worth of gas
  22. A timely sermon. (the kind you think was written just for you)
  23. Medicine/health care
  24. Chocolate chip cookies
  25. My bed
  26. Grocery stores stocked with food
  27. The mystery of how our body functions together as a whole
  28. "Pumpkin's" laugh
  29. Ice cold Coca-Cola
  30. When the days start getting longer
  31. Starbuck's dark hot chocolate
As I said, not an earth shattering list.But you really begin to notice how really blessed we are. Now to start on February!

Thursday, January 19, 2012

This is NOT Disneyland!

Okay "Mickey" this is not Disneyland! So take your friends and family and move out!

I hate winter time for more than one reason but particularly because our little house becomes the "happiest place on earth" for little rodents.Its the draw back of having a dirt basement.We have done our best to find their entry points and seal them off, at least to confine them to the basement, but they are tricky!
Their favorite haven is in my stove drawer.They store food, make their own personal deposits and climb all over my baking sheets.I haven't got anywhere else to store them so I am forced to wash them every time I need to use them. It is amazing how something so small can create such work!

Not only are they dirty and disgusting,I am limited as to the means of getting rid of them.I don't want traps.First of all because of several little fingers,not to mention my dog is not exactly high on the intelligence list,second because I don't even remotely want to hear the dreadful snapping noise they make! Poison has to be strategically placed so as not to harm said little fingers and not so bright dogs.My only other option is sticky traps.Which has its pros and cons. The pros being I don't have to worry about the safety of the kids/dog,second I don't have to listen to the snapping noise and they are pretty easy to set up.The cons are that when you catch one they are still alive and they stare at you!Trying to make you feel guilty, or they manage to get themselves off the trap by chewing off limbs and leaving them behind.On occasion they have been known to fight so wildly that they bounce the trap right out into the middle of the floor so you darn near step on them in the middle of the night on your trip to the bathroom! Are you grossed out yet??? Another con is that "not so bright" dog has been known to sit on them occasionally which is super fun!

Why the rant about mice you ask? Well lets just say DH is the king of mice killing he is good at it and is not at all bothered by ridding our house of these little critters.Me, not so much. If I can, I time it by placing the traps out at night before bed so that if an unsuspecting mouse finds his way onto a trap DH will be the first to find it and he can get rid of it so I don't have to see it. A couple of weeks ago I even hid myself in the bathroom until DH removed a dead one from under the stove! Its a great source of amusement for him.
Yesterday was the ultimate in freak-out-ness. I was in the kitchen when I was startled by a mouse that was trying to get through a hole in the wall behind our base cabinets.He got his head stuck because it wasn't quite big enough and he had shimmied himself halfway up the wall to the counter top with his head still stuck.By now I am totally going to lose it but I don't do the typical girly scream so as not to alert the girls to the problem.I thought maybe I could stick him to the trap and get rid of him with out too much problem.Ummm no. The only thing I managed to do was pull the paint off the wall and break his little neck so that he dangled from the wall. (How about now, are you super grossed out??) Then I was forced to try and pull him out (using rubber gloves) with out ripping his tail (or head) off. I did manage to get him out but let me tell you, you have never seen anyone run so fast with a plastic bag being held at arms length in -30 weather as me!!!!
Having a cat is not an option (DH is allergic). Not only that, they like to leave "presents" for their owners which is far more disgusting than the traps! We do not have the option of moving, so I guess I will have to continue to put up with our little guests.But I sure wish they would clean up after themselves!!

Saturday, December 31, 2011

This one is for you uncle "D"

Yes this post is for you.So you don't have to look at the October one any more. LOL! Hmmm what to say though.

I will try to keep my depressive nature to a minimum.But I will have to share a little in order to get to the "light at the end of the tunnel"

I think I have mentioned it in a previous post somewhere, but I do and have suffered from clinical depression over most of my teen/adult life.Some years are better than others and there have been some years when I have genuinely been happy.But right now I am in a season of shall we say "grey". Where everything is always tainted with a shadow.Instead of looking through rose colored glasses.I see everything in shades of grey.

* just a note*- yes, I have sought medical help.As of yet we have not found a long lasting solution that does not cause it to get worse.

I would say this season for me has lasted about 5 years so far.Just when I seem to get my feet back under me something pulls the rug out from underneath. It started with Grandma's death, it continued with "G"'s birth.We had a rough first few months.Then came my mom's deteriorating health and ultimately her death, followed very closely by the birth of "E". Monkey and pumpkin have had minor medical problems to deal with.Nothing serious but enough to compound things.Then you can throw in a few other minor things such as DH parents moving away and their decision to no longer participate in Christmas.It has left my grasping for anything I can hold on to.

It is hard for me because I am very relational.Family means everything to me.So to have one set of grandparents who are very distant (physically and emotionally),a strained relationship with dad (we are working on it) and almost no connection to any extended family, it has left me feeling lost and alone.Even though I am surrounded by people who love and care about me.

Most people take all of this in stride.Shake it off and start again But I don't,I can't and I feel guilty for the way I am because so many people are far worse off than I am.I get tired of being sad all the time its physically and emotionally draining. So much of my life is passing me by and I feel as though I am cheating the girls out of a happy memorable childhood.

This brings me to "the rest of the story". I have been reflecting a lot over the last few days.Trying to figure out how I can get control of this situation.I have come to the realization that what I am missing is HOPE.I am not talking about worldly hope like " I hope this will get better" or "I hope I will win the lottery" but the Hope that comes from knowing the LORD. Even though I am Christian and have been for many years, somewhere along this journey I have allowed myself to forget. I have allowed myself to say" I need to be in control"". I am the only one who can change this". Me,Me, Me. The only way I am going to fix this is to give control to the one who created me.To cling to the promises that he has made to me. That he will never leave me or forsake me, he will take care of all my NEEDS,and most important of all is that he loves me and I am his.

So my goal for the new year is to strengthen my relationship with God through thankfulness.Thanking him everyday for the blessings I do have and for the prayers he has answered. He may never take my depression away but my prayer is that he will give me what I need to withstand it when it comes. I am going to hold on to the hope that 2012 will be a better year.